Later that night...

Maureen is sound asleep, Diane and Dick are snoring away in the room next door and Glenn can't get to sleep. With no TV, radio, or other entertainment - O. K., the dripping of the faucet in the sink provides some slight amusement - Glenn is bored. An idea hits him over the head like a wet tuna. "Why not step out onto the patio and get a look at the stars, out here so far removed from city lights and other civilized activities?" He opens the door. It creaks slightly. He steps outside. There's a small patio and an equally proportioned iron bench just outside the door. Glenn sits down to enjoy the night air.

The sky is fantastic -- filled with more stars than he ever thought possible! The night is quiet. Too quiet. Thoughts of hungry jaguars -- which roam this area at will, snacking on tasty white hombres from the North -- cause Glenn to break out in a cold sweat. A strange thing to have happen when it's at least 80 degrees out!

Glenn decides it might be a good idea to get a light and scope out the surroundings. Luckily he has come to Mexico equiped with a handy-dandy MagLight key chain. He will have no need for keys anywhere in Mexico. He might have known this when he bought the light. He definitely knows this now. He pulls the light from his pocket, twists the barrel to turn it on, and slowly lets the light play over the grounds of the Dolores Alba. He is about to return to his seat when the large light fixture on the wall above the seat begins to move. On the wall is the LARGEST SPIDER he has ever seen! Its body is as big as a Baker's Square pie tin (Glenn has one in his suitcase to use for comparison). It has legs that would put an Alaskan King crab to shame. And it stands poised to leap from the wall and land on Glenn's horrified face.

Glenn races back ito the room and slams the door. The sound is enough to wake the dead, but it has absolutely no effect on the sleeping Maureen who snores on, unaware of the drama unfolding at her doorstep. Glenn decides it might be a good idea to check on the spider. His plan is simple: open door slowly, if no spider in sight, breath a sigh of relief and go to bed. But he realizes that the more likely scenario would go something like this: Open door slowly, see black blur coming towards head as the giant hairy monster wraps its eight gigantic legs around his skull like the creature in "Alien."

Just as he's about to open the door, Glenn looks down at his feet. Dozens of tiny spiders, each the size of a 50 peso coin -- Glenn cunningly places one on the floor for an accurate comparison -- are pouring in through a one-inch gap under the door! (The room is so new that they haven't had a chance to install the threshold.) Glenn gets a towel from the bathroom, soaks it in insect repellant and stuffs it into the crack. The next five minutes are spent squashing spiders with both feet and hoping that none have made it as far as the bed. Maureen finally awakes.

"Quit hopping around the room and come back to bed," she says and falls promptly back to sleep. 

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